Just some things...

1. School is over in three weeks and counting.  I will officially have taught for a whole school year in fourteen weekdays.  I am overwhelmed with how much I have learned, grown, and figured out, while also completely overwhelmed with how completely lost and underqualified I still feel sometimes.  I love my students, and am a little sad to leave them, but I am so ready to relax, rest, and refresh for next year. 

2. Speaking of next year, I will be in a different position at the same school in the fall.  Instead of core Language Arts, I will be teaching a small Reading Strategies elective class.  I am thrilled for a new opportunity and a smaller group of students, as well as to really work on growing my skills.  I am excited to be at the same school, and glad I'll see some of my students from this year in the hallway! I love the people I work with, and am really glad to get to know them better this coming year. 

3. I miss the heck out of my sister and friends who are no longer in Manhattan with us.  I want everyone I love to live in the same place.  I don't know if it will ever be easy to be away from friends and family :/

4. We have a beautiful and almost perfect house and love living in it.  Nick even mowed the yard this month and I pulled some weeds!  Yardwork is not my favorite thing but I am going to try this summer to find a few things I can enjoy about it. 

5. I am tired, stressed, and in need of some time away.  Life is hard.  It can be really challenging to find joy when I feel unsuccessful in so many ways.  I am grateful for those who are consistently and unswervingly patient with my shortcomings and failures, and continue to love me in spite of myself.

6. I am still in love with my best husband Nick, still loving my God, and still adore my precious puppies.  I am praying God really opens my eyes to ways I can change and grow this summer, as well as gives me the courage to be the wife, friend, daughter, sister, and woman I can be. 

nostalgia.

I am spending my Sunday late afternoon/evening watching One Tree Hill reruns in my sweats, eating popcorn, not grading papers or planning, and remembering.  I looked through the pictures from the night Nick and I got engaged and missed that time.  Season One of OTH takes me waaaayyy back, and I miss that time of life, those people.  I even look at our wedding pictures and am nostalgic and sad that all those friends are not still here.  Life was so much simpler, less responsibility, dare I say easier, when I wasn't twenty-five and married and owning a house and teaching kids and training puppies and staying in shape and folding my laundry and cooking healthy meals.  Don't get me wrong, I love my life so much, I love Nick so much.  I love teaching, my sweet pups, my friends, my gorgeous home.  I like not having to do homework or read boring books and write tons of papers.  I enjoy adulthood and marriage.  I just miss simplicity. 

God has so greatly blessed me in each season of my life, and I truly believe He is blessing me and teaching me and growing me in so many ways right now.  I know that I will look back in five years and miss this time as well.  I must live in today.  It is ok to miss yesterday, as long as I find things to enjoy about today too.  It is ok to miss people, as long as I don't turn a blind eye to the fact that I am so lucky to have found more friends, beautiful, awesome friends, each time I have someone move away.  I love my life so much, and I trust God is still using me and teaching me and molding me to be more like Him.